HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE!
You are 44 years old!
Every year this time, my heart goes through a heck load of emotions. I love this pretty little red dot so much. Remember I mentioned about attending last saturday's national day rehearsal? My eyes brimmed with tears as I sang the national anthem and watched the flag fly past me. It's just so touching and heartwarming. Maybe it's just because I'm an emotional wreck. I'm sure my friends will agree to that.
This year's national day parade is really excellent! Though it's really a pity that I don't have tickets to the actual day parade today. I watched it on tv. And said the pledge at 8.22pm. I can say confidently and proudly that I am very very proud to be a singaporean and I love singapore!

My aunt's getting married next month. It came as a surprise to me because although she has been with him for quite a long time, I didn't expect marriage to be on their cards. I thought they'll just be together without being bound by marriage. I feel so happy for her. But I'm sad that my grandmother can no longer physically attend her wedding.
Ever since the passing away of my grandmother, I've been crying everyday without fail. Although I try not to cry in front of my parents and colleagues, I still cry when I'm alone. Told you I'm an emotional wreck.
But I guess probably only 2 or 3 of my truckloads of friends can really understand my feelings because only they had been through almost the same thing and they were probably one of the only ones who were as close to their grandmothers as I were.
Truthfully, suicidal thoughts did ran through my mind. But I filtered them away as I'm strong willed. I know, my dying probably would help but cause more problems because people around me will still have to rush around settling my wake and funeral and stuff. So dying isn't a solution at all. Don't worry my friends, I will never attempt to do such a silly thing. I just feel like some part of me inside as died. But I will not die now because I have not yet fulfil a number of my dreams.